Talking to your kids about sex can be awkward. Laci Green to the rescue! She’s here to save the day with 10 tips on “The Sex Talk”.
Tip #1: Make the Sex Talk the Sex Talk(s)
Sexual development starts in childhood and extends into adulthood. By not communicating about sex early on, it conveys that sex is something embarrassing that shouldn’t be asked about.
Tip #2: Tell It Like It Is
Don’t lie about sex because you think they are too young to understand. Don’t use other names for their anatomy or use euphemisms. Be accurate and truthful.
Tip #3: Initiate the Conversation
Don’t give it the feel of a lecture. This will make them less receptive to the information. Reference a popular movie or T.V. show to start the conversation. Laci also recommends staying away from personal questions as they can become awkward and not relaying anything they say during the conversation to extended family or friends.
Tip #4: It’s Normal!
Between the ages of 10 and 13, kids begin to have sexual urges and feelings. This is completely normal and healthy, so don’t freak out! Reprimanding them for these thoughts and feelings tells them they can’t come to you in an emergency. They will tune you out and do things on the down-low.
Tip #5: Respect!
Let them know that they deserve to be respected and, in turn, they need to respect others. Their body doesn’t belong to you or anyone else but themselves – that goes for their partner as well.
Tip #6: It’s Real.
Teens go through a lot of firsts – just like you did! Don’t dismiss their emotions. What they are feeling is real and raw and very intense.
Tip #7: Comprehensive Sex Ed
Cover a broad range of topics. For example: masturbation, menstruation, gender identity, sexual orientation, healthy vs. abusive relationships, readiness for sex, sexual pleasure, communication/consent, respecting your partner’s body, body image, and self-esteem.
Tip #8: Make It Clear What They Deserve
They deserve happiness, safety, a healthy and pleasurable sex life. They deserve to be secure about their body and to be respected.
Tip #9: Be a Resource
Teens need help accessing things like birth control and condoms. If you feel like there are questions you can’t answer, point them towards some good literature, websites or youtube channels.
Tip #10: Love Unconditionally
Let them know you are there for them, always. This becomes even more important in case they are assaulted or have a pregnancy scare.
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