How To Spice Up SEX LIFE

A relationship expert Alexandra Potora gives us tips on how to realistically spice up our sex life. She mentions the word realistically because some of us don’t have hours in the day to dedicate to lovemaking with our busy schedules. So, this is for all of you busy bees out there. Taking care of your family and work is great, but be sure to not neglect your sex life. One, sex is important to keep your relationship alive, and two, it is proven to have healing properties.

#1 Speak Up

Be vocal about what you like to your partner. Most of us are not mind-readers, so it’s important to let them know about your preferences, and ask for it. The more you communicate with each other, the better your sex life is going to be. Never feel afraid or ashamed of sharing your fantasies. You are in this together, so establishing a safe space for you to be open about your desires is a must in every healthy relationship. Once you let them know what gets your fire going, find out what they like and want.

Three questions you can ask are:

  • What do you like?
  • What’s your favorite position?
  • What would you like to try next time?

#2 Switch It Up

Try different locations. Having sex in bed all the time can get boring, so why not get creative with locations in your house? Some of these spots could be kitchen counters, in the shower, on the bathroom vanity, on the floor in the living room and other rooms, chairs, tables, couches, in the laundry room, on the stairs, etc. There are so many places in your house you could have sex. Just make sure you have privacy, and nobody’s going to walk in on you. But, if you are into exhibitionism, then I’m just going to go silent here.

#3 Getup

This tip is for ladies out there. What are you wearing in the evenings? Yes, PJs and sweatpants are super comfy, but wearing something sexy for your heartthrob works wonders. This is not to say you have to be walking around in lingerie. It IS possible to look sexy and also be comfortable. Something with long lace sleeves could be an option. Also, something with a deep V-neck that brings out the breasts or a man’s button-up shirt that’s buttoned only half-way. Find options that make you feel comfortable, and at the same time bring out your assets.

Another tip in here would be to choose the color red. Culturally and universally, red is associated with love and passion. In a report from the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, men were more likely to say they wanted to have sex with a woman if she was wearing red.

#4 Laugh Before Bed

Watch a funny show or a movie before calling it a night. Laughing gets your blood pumping, and increases your heart rate, which can help enhance your sexual experience. Besides, it can also work for getting both of you to relax and bond. Laughing helps you get rid of stress. So, why the hell not? Snuggling together and watching something hilariously entertaining that brings your spirits up is always a good thing to do.

#5 Seven-Position Challenge

Over the next thirty days, starting today, implement seven different positions in your sex life that you either haven’t done before or haven’t done in awhile. If you go to Alexandra’s website, you can find an image with multiple sex positions, or you can also check out the post about Kama Sutra sex positions for something extra to walk away with tonight. Talk to your partner about this, show them what you’d like to try and get adventurous with your horizontal tangos.

#6 Morning Sex

Dr. Debby Herbenick, who is a research scientist and sex advice columnist, said that having sex in the morning releases oxytocin, also known as the feel-good chemical, and that makes couples feel loved and bonded all day long. Morning sex is good for your health, overall mood and relationship dynamic, while for men, morning sex also helps them last longer and have more energy, since testosterone levels peak overnight. But, don’t just blindly follow the studies, because we are all different and some might be in the mood for sex during mornings, while others might feel the sexiest during the dark hours.

Keep communicating and experimenting, my friends, and until next time!

7 Hard Facts About Boners

In this episode of ThinkTank John Iadarola and Hannah Cranston share with us 7 hard facts about boners. Some of these contain good advice for improving the quality of your erections, so keep reading.

#1 Tobacco

Smoking has been found to decrease erection quality and length by about 1cm, which is around half an inch. As if lung deterioration was not enough! Smoking harms your cardiovascular health, and this, in turn, affects your erection, obstructing your blood vessels down there to stretch out to their full potential. So, quit that nasty habit and start exercising! There are countless methods out there that can help you quit smoking, so know that you are supported. Just take that first step to the healthier you, and keep moving forward.

#2 Types

There are three different types of erections: psychogenic, reflexogenic and nocturnal. Psychogenic erections result from a fantasy. The power of the mind, man. Reflexogenic erections result from physical contact. And, nocturnal erections occur during the night, typically during REM sleep. In case you were wondering, REM stands for Rapid Eye Movement. During REM sleep your brain activity increases, your pulse quickens, and you have dreams.

#3 Amount

Men on average have 11 erections each day, and 3-5 each night. Don’t think that guys are constantly walking around with boners, okay? Some of these might last for just a few seconds. And, if an erection lasts for more than four hours, go see a doctor! It’s not healthy to have blood rushing to one part of your body for that long.

#4 Animal Kingdom

There are also three different types of erections shape-wise across the animal kingdom. “Straight” erections are the ones in which the erection is of similar width at base and end. The “Eiffel Tower” erection has a wider shaft at the base than at the top. And, the “baseball bat” erection has a base that is narrower than at the tip.

#5 Blood

To become erect, penises require about 130ml of blood. Clearly, that depends on the size of your penis. Blood flow to your penis might be impaired if you have clogs in your veins, cardiovascular issues, if you are smoking and eating junk food. Again, if you want to keep your penis happy, take care of your body. Everything is connected, so your overall health greatly affects the quality of your erections.

#6 Donuts

What?! What does this even have to do with penises?! Well, believe it or not, according to studies, the smell of donuts has been found to increase penile blood flow by 13%. Now, I’m not sure if it was the donut or the sugar that increased arousal, but Hannah claims that it’s the shape of donuts, not the smell.

#7 Satisfaction

30% of men, on average, are dissatisfied with the duration of their erections. So, if you are not happy with your boner, you are not alone. But, why would you beat yourself over it? First and foremost, let’s establish that it’s how you use it, not how big it is. And, secondly, if you can’t last for as long as you want to, there are numerous things you can do to fix that. So, get off your sorry ass, and learn tips and tricks on how to last longer in bed.

Love and take care of you, my friends, and until next time!

How to Overcome Erectile Dysfunction

Do you or someone you know suffer from erectile dysfunction? Before we get into this, note that around 52% of men suffer from ED. So, there’s nothing to be ashamed of. Stuff happens, and if you want to do something about it, know that there ARE resources available to you, and it is possible to overcome erectile dysfunction.

ED becomes more common with age, but around a quarter of men in their 20s suffer from it too. There are many reasons why you might be suffering from erectile dysfunction. If it’s something that worries you, go and visit your doctor. The common causes for ED are high cholesterol, high blood pressure, diabetes, being overweight, or a condition called metabolic syndrome. Some even have ED from stress.

If you are suffering from stress, it’s very important to identify the root cause of it, so that you can tackle it. There are numerous ways of getting rid of stress. Do your research and figure out which treatment resonates with you the most. Talk therapies are a good option, but make sure you find the right talk therapist for yourself.

Moreover, junk food, sugary food, fizzy drinks, smoking, alcohol, drugs, all of that affects the health of your penis. So, if you are not taking care of yourself, chances are you either do already or are going to suffer from ED. So, get your s*** together, and be mindful of your health! Take a look at your lifestyle, and see if there are any areas you can improve.

There are a lot of things you can do to help with erectile dysfunction. There are pills you can take for it, natural supplements to boost your libido, as well as do exercises that increase your testosterone. You can also get gels, creams, lotions, all of which have active ingredients that prolong erection. The safest item for that would be cock rings, though. They work by restricting blood flow and trapping it in your penis, making your erection last longer.

Long story short, if you are suffering from erectile dysfunction, know that you are not alone and it is a very common thing. There are a lot of things you can do to take care of it. Start with going to your doctor and talking to them about it. And, do you research as well. There are a lot of online support groups you can get answers from, so ED or not, be the wonderful you that you are and keep rocking. Until next time, my friends!

First Date Sex? – by Allana Pratt

Have you ever wondered if you should sleep with the person on your first date? Do you do it? Do you not? Is it the need to score, or the fear of rejection that’s driving you? Is it the need to feel wanted? Or, are you seized by a genuine desire to connect with that person? Are you following your heart?

Intimacy expert Allana Pratt of Digital Romance TV talks about first date sex.

New research conducted by the datingadvice.com has found that 74% of men were more likely than women to date someone after having sex on their first date. Interesting, isn’t it? You would expect men to be the womanizers, and women to be the heartbroken victims of Lotharios’ games. But, don’t fall for stereotypes and preconceived notions.

Let’s get a little personal in here, and have a heart-to-heart talk. What are your dating choices? Ponder it for a moment. Have you ever felt like you need to have your void filled after a long period of being single? Is it the emptiness that needs curbing with a sexual act?

Think the drink through until the end.

  1. When you are on that first date, are you empty or full? Are you coming from a place of clarity and confidence, or are you indeed meeting them to make yourself feel complete?
  2. What’s your motivation for wanting to have sex on your first date? Is it to the desire to triumph over something and feel enough? Is it the fear of rejection or abandonment that’s rushing you into it?

Now, consider this.

What would it take you to go out on a date where you are so confident and full that sex is a choice not influenced by the wrong reasons?

Imagine yourself truly being present with that person. You check in with your body, your heart, your soul, and you decide whether sex with them on your first or tenth date is what will make you feel more expansive.

Ask questions.

Closely listen to your heart and let it answer the following questions:

  • Does sleeping with this person expand your life?
  • Does sleeping with this person honor you?
  • Will it be fun?
  • Will it be safe?
  • Will it be a contribution to your life?
  • Will they be grateful for you?

This is not to talk you out of enjoying sex on your dates, first or not. This is to awaken your connection with your heart, and let your authentic self come forth and make decisions.

Have fun experimenting, my friends, and until next time!

3 Unusual Foreplay Techniques

YouTube’s famous sexpert and “the Headmistress of Pleasure”, as seen in Women’s Health Magazine, Layla Martin shares 3 unusual foreplay techniques. Layla has studied sexuality at Stanford University as well as in Asia with Tantric masters. She has been featured on Huffington Post, CBS, Playboy, etc. If you’d like to know more about her, her books and courses, check out her website. And, now let’s talk about the foreplay warmups.

1. The Setup

You and your partner sit across from each other. Imagine you have a bubble around you. Face each other, and take turns tossing out everything that you don’t want. For example, you discard your stressful thoughts of the day, your expectations, your insecurities.

You pretty much strip yourself of the thoughts that do not serve you and hinder you from being truly present with your partner. You let go of the negative energy to create space for the positive to enter.

Afterwards, you call in what you do want. For example, you pull in the energy of passion and fire; you pull in the connectedness with your body; you pull in freedom and wildness.

2. Gratitude Love Eyegazing

This one is specifically good, if you have been struggling or have been distant from each other. It might sound cheesy at first, but give it a try, and you’ll see for yourself how it really helps you bond with your partner.

Look into each other’s eyes in silence for around one or two minutes. When you feel the time is right, start saying what you are grateful for about one another. Take turns, and then switch and say what you love about one another.

3. Soul Breathing

Find a comfortable position where your mouth is next to your partner’s ear. You can do this by having her sit on your lap or having her straddle you. Then, you are going to take slow, deep breaths together. Turn on some slow, sensual music, and breathe together for the duration of the track.

Keep experimenting, my friends, and until next time!

THE SEX TALK

Welcome to the sex talk, ladies and gentlemen. The famous YouTuber Thomas “TomSka” Ridgewell, who has around 5M subscribers on his channel, shares all the basics you need to know about sex. If you are a virgin, this video is something you should be watching. Even if you have been dancing horizontal tangoes for awhile, you might find quite a few new information, so keep on reading, folks.

Part One. The Bits.

As you might or mightn’t already know, sex is (usually) when people use their genitals to experience the bliss that beggars description. If you are born with a penis, your genitals are composed of glands/head, urethra, shaft, and testicles. Penises come in all different shapes, and sizes. They stand to attention when excited – the process known as erection – and sleep it out the rest of the time. Testicles are where the sperm is made, and the sperm is what makes babies when it successfully fertilizes a female egg.

Now, if you are born with a vagina, your genitals consist of a clitoris, labia major, labia minor, urethra, and vagina. Much like penises, they come in a wide range of shapes and sizes. On top of naturally cleaning themselves out once a month when not pregnant – the process, known as menstruation – a vagina can also make itself wet when in the mood for sex. When semen, which contains sperm, enters a vagina, chances are that the woman will get pregnant, if some form of protection is not used.

Moving up the body, ladies also have breasts. The ring of pigmented skin surrounding a nipple is called areola, and the nipple… well, most likely you know what that is. If not, check out the video below for a visual demonstration. Don’t get any ideas, though. You are not going to see real boobies in the video. Breasts also come in all different shapes and sizes. Furthermore, milk comes out of them when you have a baby, as is the typical characteristic of any mammal.

Part Two. Sexuality.

There are so many different types of sexual orientation that the topic needs its separate post. But, to put it briefly, heterosexuality is when people of the opposite genders are attracted to one another. Homosexuality is a sexual attraction to the same gender. Bisexuality is a sexual attraction toward both female and male. Asexuality is when a person is not sexually attracted to anyone. Pansexuality, also known as omnisexuality, is when a person is attracted to all forms of gender identities. And, then there are gender identities, which is completely different from sexuality.

Part Three. Virginity.

When it comes to the decision about when you should start having sex, there are two things you should take into consideration:

1. The Law.
Depending on where you live, the age at which you can start having sex, varies. For example, the age of consent in the United Kingdom is 16, while in the United States it’s 18. Always be informed of the laws in your country, and follow them no matter what.

2. You Need To Be Ready.
Don’t let anyone pressure you into losing your virginity, or having sex for that matter. You are the one who decides when you want to do it. What happens to your body should be your choice and yours alone.

Part Four. Sex.

There are a lot of ways to have sex, with countless positions available in Kama Sutra and vast sex ED content available online, some of which don’t necessarily involve the contact of a genital to a genital. It’s extremely important to use protection to not end up with a baby when you are not ready for a family, and to not end up having to go through an abortion. Contraceptive pills and implants are used to prevent conception, in other words, fertilization. But, they do not protect you from STDs (sexually transmitted diseases), which is why a condom is your best pal. Some STDs are curable, while others can potentially kill you, so be very careful about who you sleep with, and have condoms with you at all times.

Part Five. Rape.

Remember this clearly – you NEVER have to do anything you don’t want to do. You are NEVER obliged to sleep with someone, even if that person is already your partner. Any type of sexual activity where someone has not given their consent or has REVOKED it is sexual assault or rape. And, in case you were wondering about consent – consent is a willing, sober, and continuous ‘YES’.

Part Six. Shame.

There are a lot of ways of having sex and getting kinky with your partner. As long as you are abiding by the law of the land, and both you and the other person are into it, then it’s all good. Everyone has different likes and preferences, so don’t ever feel ashamed of your sexual fantasies. What you do with your body is your business, and what you do with someone else is between you and them alone.

Have fun experimenting, my friends, and until next time!

3 Things Women WISH Men Did in Bed

An intimacy expert Allana Pratt gives us a breakdown on 3 things women wish men did in bed. In case you are curious about Allana’s credibility, let me disclose that she is an author of three books, a coach to celebrities, and has been featured on CBS, TLC, FOX and more. Now that you are convinced of her professionalism, keep on reading, or check out the video below.

#1 Eye Contact

It’s not possible to constantly maintain eye contact with your partner during sex, and quite frankly, it would be weird if you did. However, if you lose yourself in body parts of your woman for too long and don’t return to the windows to her soul, the disconnect commences. You want her to feel like a work of art, not a piece of meat. Be sure to make eye contact when you make love to her. If she closes her eyes, ask her to open them, and be more connected to you. There’s an exquisite place of a whole new dimension when you are truly present with one another.

#2 Stay With Her

We’re not talking about relationships. If it’s not working out, by all means, find the mature and amicable way to end it. What we’re talking about is staying with her during her sexual experience no matter what. Let her journey into the ocean of Eros be okay and judgment-free. Be the banks of the river, if she cries, if she screams, if she gets naughtier than usual or dominates you. Come what may, and let her unleash her inner Goddess. Hold onto your open-mindedness and nonjudgmental stateliness, creating a safe space for her to open up and let her erotic creature show. Letting it flow and diving into the mystery is what make lovemaking deliciously unforgettable.

#3 Stay Open

Do not assume that if you both have reached your orgasm, it’s time to sign off. Be open to the fact that there is more to come after you have climaxed. Stay connected with her, even if you can’t have an erection again. That’s totally normal. Being connected with her is what matters. Be there for her, if she wants to have more orgasms, or just talk and fade into you and your world. What helps with this is giving her that sensual energy throughout the day, outside the bedroom. Doing things like letting your hand slowly slide down her back, gently brushing away her hair, nuzzling into her neck and saying how amazing it was last night or this morning. Extend that lustful energy outside sex, so that the entire relationship becomes a sensual dance that keeps the fire going.

Keep experimenting, my friends, and until next time!

How to Make A Girl Sleep With You?

In this episode of Kamalifestyles Gabriella Ryan talks about how to make a girl sleep with you. Kama Life Styles teach the art of dating with their coaches, who are all fully trained in Neuro-Linguistic Programming. NLP is an approach to communication, personal development, and psychotherapy. They have been featured on BBC, as well as numerous radio channels and magazines. Go to kamalifestyles.com for more on them, but for now, let’s find out how we can seduce ladies.

When you want to sleep with a woman, make sure you don’t fall into her friend zone. You want her thinking about you even when you are not with her, and how can all of this be achieved? Gabriella gives us five tips to get her begging for you in your bed.

#1 Be clear but not obvious.

Some women find hit and run repulsive. You want to make her feel sexually attracted to you, but at the same time, you don’t want to be seen as the guy who is only after sex. Women don’t usually sleep on their first date, and that’s the way it should be unless you are just looking for a good lay and no deep connection with her whatsoever. Be your confident and charming self when around her, and make sure you don’t pressure her into having sex with you. Flirt with her and compliment her on her beauty, her talents, her intellect. Use both verbal and nonverbal flirt cues.

#2 Lose the script.

The reason you might not be getting laid is that you are using the same script, which is not working. You need to be more authentic, and let her see you… including your vulnerable side. Allow your conversations and actions to flow naturally. Go with her pace and let it be her decision when to sleep with you. Mental and emotional stimulation is necessary to get her juices flowing.

#3 Make it about her.

It’s sexy that you are wearing a good suit and a quality watch. But, unless you are looking for a gold digger, possessions are not what’s going to get her in bed. Have meaningful conversations with her. Genuinely listen to her. Make her feel comfortable and safe around you. When you listen to her more than you talk, you get to know about her fantasies, her likes, and preferences. The more you listen to her, the easier it’ll be for you to figure out which angle to use to get her waking up in your bed the next morning.

#4 Build trust and show vulnerability.

When you are too nice, you might get friend-zoned. And, if you are too cocky, the only person sleeping with you that night is going to be you and your hand perhaps. Women are emotional beings. Tell her a touching story that shows your vulnerable side. Talk about your passions, e.g., your goals of changing the world into a better place. But, of course, be sure to speak the truth, not fables. This will indicate that you trust her and enjoy conversing with her, causing her to open up to you.

#5 Use the power of seduction.

When you master the seduction techniques, you will always be the alpha male in the room. Play with the woman’s senses, such as lighting scented candles or having aromatic flowers in the room. Speaking of which, make sure you have showered and smell nice. It’s good to invest in colognes, since the smell on your skin can play a huge part in turning her on or off. Dim lighting creates a romantic atmosphere and reduces resistance because some women are more conscious about their bodies. Show her your confidence and dominance with your gentle touch, and help her get in a seduction mode.

Have fun experimenting, my friends, and until next time!

How She Wants You To Handle Her Breasts

Have you ever wondered how your woman wants you to handle her breasts? There is nothing wrong in asking her how she likes it, but it’s good to do your research and learn the proper way of fondling her bosom.

In this episode of AskMen, Marlee Kostiner gives us several useful tips.

Cup them from behind.

Standing behind her and caressing her breasts can create a very sensual experience. You can start with massaging her shoulders, and then work your way down to her chest. Doing this in front of the mirror so that both of you can see each other can feel more exciting. Caressing your woman’s breasts releases chemicals, called oxytocin, in her brain, which enhances her mood. So, be sure to give her a good breast-massage during foreplays.

Use your lips and tongue.

Saliva creates natural lubrication, which can feel amazing on her nipples. The nipples are very sensitive, so if you are using your fingers too much, they might get irritated. It’s important to incorporate your mouth when giving love to her titties. Do not focus solely on her nipples, though, for too much licking might desensitize them. Lick around her nipples, kiss her breast. The top part of the breast, above the nipple, is proven to be the most sensitive part of the breast, so explore all of her bosom, not just her nipples.

Get her wet.

A shower is a great place for foreplay. Hot water will make her breasts even more sensitive to your touch. You can gently lather her body with soap while caressing. Just make sure you are gentle, and your movements feel natural. And, take your time.

Rub above her bra.

You don’t necessarily have to wait until her bra is off to start fondling her breasts. It can feel pleasurable for her to rub above the material. This, however, should not last long. If you keep caressing her bosom over her bra, it might start to feel uncomfortable for her. Start with playing with the fabric, maybe sliding your fingers inside if her bra is stretchable, teasing her, and then when the time feels right, set her free from it.

Motorboating.

You have to proceed with caution when it comes to motorboating. This creates more of a comedic moment than a sensual one. So, if you are at the beginning of the relationship, try to postpone it for a later time. If you two have the same sense of humor, it might be a fun thing to do during foreplay. The sensation might be ticklish for her, and being tickled naturally leads to arousal. If you two are playing around and being silly, then motorboating would make for a fun experience.

Be gentle and rough.

Women appreciate tenderness, especially when it comes to her breasts. Alternating between gentle and rough strokes is good. If you want to grope her, make sure you build up to it. Start with gentle caresses, then grip her tighter and see if she responds positively to your touches. The key to all foreplay and sex is to pay attention to your partner’s reactions, verbal cues, and body language. Some women like gentleness throughout the play, while others like it a bit rough. So, touch your woman the way she likes to be touched.

Tease her.

A lot of women’s arousal is a mental game, so teasing her is sure to set the mood. Touching her breasts lightly with a feather or ice cubes can feel very arousing. Also barely touching her with your hands, lightly grazing her nipples is sure to turn her on and create good sexual tension.

Tug gently on her nipples.

No poking or twisting the nipples. They are extremely sensitive, so you have to be very careful when handling those babies. Gentle tugging, especially with your mouth over them, can feel very nice. Again, pay attention to how she is reacting to whatever you are doing. But, don’t overthink it. Enjoy giving her love. The more you get off on her pleasure, the more she will relax and open up for you.

Have fun experimenting, my friends, and until next time!

6 Things You Didn’t Know About Dicks

We talked vaginas last night, so it’s time to give attention to our glorious penises. The famous YouTuber, entertainer, and comedian Joe Santagato shares 6 things you probably didn’t know about dicks.

#1 You can deadlift with your dong.

For those of you, who don’t know what deadlifting is, it’s picking up a bunch of weight. So, they are saying that you can pick up a bunch of weight with your dick. Joe discusses this with humorous disbelief, but he provides us with an excerpt of a clip where a man actually deadlifts another human with his penis. Check out the video below, if you want to see a wonder, and get a laugh or two.

#2 Ballbusting.

Ballbusting is a fetish in which men enjoy when women kick them in the testicles. I’ve been aware of people getting off on genital pain, but I had no idea this fetish was so popular. Ballbusting does not only mean “kicking” men in the balls. It’s a practice where his testicles are kicked, slapped, squeezed, kneed, flicked or basically anything that will cause pain to his nuts, because that would give him pleasure. Hey, no judgement. If this is what you are into, let your freaky show, man! We are living in a free world.

#3 Fetuses get erections.

According to Ultrasound in Obstetrics and Gynecology, male fetuses can have an erection around 16 weeks gestation. There are ultrasound scans to prove it, and the phenomenon of fetal erection has been recognized for some two decades now. Oh, the things babies do in the womb! Trippy, eh?

#4 Orgasms.

The average male orgasm lasts 6 seconds. The average female orgasm lasts 23 seconds. Unfair would be the word for this, wouldn’t you agree? Joe jokes about how the male orgasm is as long as a vine video, while the female orgasm is around half a minute. All joking aside, there is actually a technique where you can control your orgasm and experience it for a longer time.

#5 Penises can break.

There are not actually bones in your boner, so it’s not the same injury as, for example, breaking your arm. The condition is known as penile fracture, and it occurs when your erect penis sustains some kind of force. Go easy on ballbusting, if you are into it, gentlemen! What happens if you get a penile fracture? Do you get to wear a dick cast?

#6 Size.

A man’s penis can shrink up to 2 centimeters if he doesn’t get a regular erection. Well, now you know that jerking off has actually paid off! If you don’t use it, you lose… an inch of it. Now the question is – if you masturbate regularly, why don’t you get extra centimeters on your ding-dong?

Be sure to check out the video below, and until next time, my friends!